Title: Cruise Yourself (filk)

Author: longbeachtrekstar ( longbeachtrekstar@yahoo.com )

Series: VOY

Code: J/7/T/Kes/Seska

Rating: NC-17

Summary: Voyager is destined to be a floating orgy if Janeway can't get it home. (Would that really be so bad?)

Disclaimer: Paramount owns Star Trek. The original song is by a delicious chocolate candy that melts in your mouth, not in your hand. I'm just writing this for fun, not making any profit, and not trading songs over the internet, so please don't pop a cap in my ass.

Archiving: FFF, ASCEM, others please ask.

Feedback: Yes please, here or by email.

Note: Based on Eminem's "Lose Yourself" (2002).

Written for Round XII of the Femme Fuh-q Fest -- http://www.svpress.us/femmefuhqfest/




CRUISE YOURSELF (filk)

by longbeachtrekstar, August 2003





(spoken)
Look, if you had one shot or one opportunity
To return your ship safely home in one moment
Would you take it or just let it slip?


(rappin')

Janeway's palms are sweaty, pussy's wet, tits are heavy

There's stains on her uniform already, her funk is heady

Now she's flyin' through space, tryin' to match Seven's pace

She's steerin' the ship with her hands while Seven sits on her face

She licks her twat high and low, Seven says "faster" then "slow"

If she keeps this up much longer her pussy's just gonna blow

Alarms ringin' now, ship surrounded, how?

Then the Kazon take a shot and a torpedo goes pow!

Snap back to reality, oh there goes gravity

Wrapped in depravity, can't think straight but she

Won't give up that easily, no, she comms to Torres "Let's go!"

But B'Elanna's a whore, she's squattin' on the warp core

'Cause she wants one more shot, of hot plasma in her twat

Tom offers her his big cock, then Seska up and yells "Stop!

Let me lick you instead, don't give Tom any head

If you wrap your lips around that dick, I'll just kill you dead"



You better cruise your ship through the slipstream, the wormhole, the subspace
Or else you're never gettin' home
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to fly
If you don't make it home, you'll just have sex 'til you die


B'Elanna's juice is escapin', through her pussy that's gapin'

This bitch is hers for the takin', make her scream

Seska moves toward... her wormhole... her asshole...

Normal sex is borin', but Klingon sex is close to post mortem

Her clit grows harder, her pussy grows hotter

All across the quadrant she's known as the cunt-gobbler

Meanwhile, Kes is in sickbay, but she is ready to play

She tells the E.M.H. "F-U, I'm out to get myself laid"

She goes to engineering, over the railing she's peerin'

She sees Seska who B'Elanna 'tween her legs is steerin'

They're in a hot sixty-nine, which to Kessy looks fine

If she can be next on that pussy then she'll stand in line

Walkin' in on this scene, Captain Janeway goes ga-ga

But the beat goes on, da-da-dum da-dum da-da



You better cruise your ship through the slipstream, the wormhole, the subspace
Or else you're never gettin' home
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to fly
If you don't make it home, you'll just have sex 'til you die


"No more games or I'll change what you call pain"

Said Janeway to them in the brig, the three girls caged

She was horny in the beginnin', but her mood all changed

She's been sucked on and eaten out and screwed all day

But she kept flyin' and tryin' to plot the way home

Best believe she's ready to make someone else moan

She's frustrated inside, amplified by the

Fact that she can't get it on with 7-of-9

It's gettin' real nasty, you can even hear her cryin'

But it's not tv, there's no Jeri Lynn Ryan

Now she is ripe, her nipples are so hard

And they're gettin' even harder

Tryin' to pinch and twist and tease

And please without dishonor

'Cause she's a Captain not a prima donna

She don't want a Borg-Ocampa drama screamin'

She says it's time for all of them to stop reamin'

They can fuck or fly home, but her answer was a hot moan

So take your best phaser shot, Prime Directive or not

Success is her only motherfuckin' option, failure's not

"Girls, I love you, but this spaceship's going home

I will not grow old in the Delta Zone"

So here they go, it's their shot, warp fail them not

'Cause this may be the only opportunity that they got



You better cruise your ship through the slipstream, the wormhole, the subspace
Or else you're never gettin' home
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to fly
If you don't make it home, you'll just have sex 'til you die


(spoken)

You can do anything you set your mind to, be-otch!

(piano plinking...)



(End)


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