DEANNA LOVES HER THESAURUS

Counselor Deanna Troi stepped naked from the showers in the locker rooms behind the Enterprise gymnasium. She had just finished a strenuous class of Mok'bara, and the soft water washing away her salty sweat had been a pleasant relief. Reaching for a towel, she began wiping the moisture from her body. She ran the soft cloth across her tits, paying particular attention to her niblets, which stiffened in the cool air. Sliding the towel lower, she ran it over her pussy, rubbing particularly hard against her throne of pleasure.

At the sound of someone approaching, she turned her attention to the less sensuous task of drying her legs. Straightening up again, she found herself looking at Doctor Beverly Crusher. Deanna was proud of her own boobs, but she thought Beverly was positively zaftig. That was an obscure word she had heard Data use once in quite an amusingly inappropriate setting. It was Yiddish for "juicy" and referred to big-breasted women.

Bev was likewise naked, and Deanna couldn't keep her eyes off the redhead's gorgeous love-muffins. The doctor's luscious milk-duds jiggled sensuously as she approached the counselor. As beautiful as Bev's cherry-top-sundaes were, Deanna's eyes also wandered down to her sweet tasting sugar-donut.

"Great workout, wasn't it," commented Deanna as she gave her fun-bags a final swipe with the towel.

"I'm afraid I was a little distracted," admitted Beverly. "I was watching you in the mirror. Y'know, those milk-jugs of yours really bounce around when you exercise."

"You should talk," teased Deanna. She stepped up, pushing her Mickey-and-Minnie against Beverly's Wilma-and-Betty. "Your knick-knacks are much bigger than my hee-haws."

"I don't know why you can't just call them bazongas, like everyone else."

"Call them whatever you want," said the counselor, "as long as I get to taste those delicious cupcakes." Then, right there in the locker room, where anyone could walk in on them, Deanna started licking and sucking Beverly's orbs-of-heavenly-fame.

As luck would have it, Doctor Selar, who had also been in Lieutenant Worf's Mok'bara class, passed by the far end of the aisle. She stopped short at what she saw -- the ship's counselor lapping away at the bazookas of the ship's doctor.

"Mmmm," moaned Bev, her head tilting back, and her red mane of wet hair tumbling over her bare shoulders. As Deanna nibbled on her dumplings, Bev slid her fingers between the Betazoid's legs and over her moistening treasure-box. "Your honey-pot sure is hot."

Deanna mirrored the doctor's motion, placing her palm on top of Beverly's cooze. "And you love-cleft is dripping wet."

Selar couldn't resist hovering nearby. She slumped against the wall, allowing her towel to fall open as she also began to finger her stink-pot. Her Vulcan control notwithstanding, she bit her lip to avoid moaning as she frigged her nether-mouth faster and faster.

"Yes," hissed Crusher to Troi at the other end of the aisle. "Play with my lily-puss." She slumped to the floor and spread her legs as Deanna delved into her garden-of-delight. Deanna gently parted her dew-flaps and began licking at the lovely pearl of her clitoris. "Yes," repeated Beverly. "Yes, keep polishing the pearl. My tender-button is so sensitive. I love playing with my bald-man-in-a-boat."

Deanna raised her head, her face shiny with Beverly's juice. "I didn't know Captain Picard had a boat."

*****

The next evening, the object of Troi's misinformation was having a drink in Ten Forward with his First Officer.

"It's true!" Riker was exclaiming. "I heard it from Geordi, who heard it from Nurse Ogawa, who heard it from Doctor Selar, who actually *saw* them in the locker room."

"Pish-posh, Number One. Rumors and gossip -- every ship is full of them. You should be less gullible."

"Well," smirked Riker, taking a swig of his drink as Data entered the bar and approached them. "All I know is, I'd pay pure latinum to watch our fair doctor go down on Deanna's hair-pie."

They both chuckled, and with a conspiratorial glance around them, Picard lowered his voice and added, "Not to mention our lovely counselor eating out Beverly's cookie-jar."

They laughed again as Data looked on in puzzlement. "Inquiry: Hair-pie? Cookie-jar? Are there new items on the menu here?"

The two senior officers laughed even louder. "No, Data," answered Picard. "We were just ... Oh, dear. How shall I put this?" Riker looked on in continuing amusement, but offered no help. "We were just having a friendly joke about... vaginas." The Captain had never uttered a more uncomfortable word in his life.

Data's gold eyes darted back and forth as he accessed reference files within his artificial brain. "Vagina. Oh, I see. Colloquialisms. Slang. As in cunt, cunny, bearded-clam, love-tunnel, baby-factory, poon-tang, hoo-hoo, ya-ya, fuzzy-"

"Data!"

"-muzzy. Captain?"

"That's enough."

"Yes, Captain."

*****

Nurse Alyssa Ogawa was putting away the last of a new shipment of supplies when Counselor Troi entered Sickbay. A sudden wave of nerves swept over the nurse as she recalled Doctor Selar's story about what had happened in the locker room.

"Nurse Ogawa," began Troi in a syrupy voice. "I'm afraid I'm overdue for my annual physical. Could you please give me an examination ... a very *thorough* examination."

"Of course, Counselor," said Alyssa uncertainly. She gestured Troi into a side exam room, closing a privacy curtain behind them. After a few moments of checking eyes and ears, she said, "Please take off your clothes," in as business-like a manner as possible.

With more sultry motions than was required in a Sickbay exam room, Troi stood and turned her back to Alyssa, asking, "Could you undo this for me?"

Alyssa stepped up and gently pulled the release down Deanna's back, all the way down to the top of her ass. "Thank you," replied Troi, turning to face Ogawa again as she shrugged her bodysuit off her shoulders. As the clothing fell away, Alyssa watched Deanna's succulent cantaloupes come into view. "Do you have to examine my coconuts?" asked Deanna, hefting each of them with her hands.

"They're much too big to be coconuts. Melons, maybe. Or pumpkins, even! And yes, I definitely need to examine them." Ogawa carefully squeezed and caressed each of Deanna's milk-cans, quickly zeroing in on their centers-of-delight. Leaning closer to her patient, Alyssa stuck out her tongue and began taking long, loving swipes at Deanna's butter-bags. Sucking her nipples till they turned into hard little nubs, Alyssa commented, "I love your big-brown-eyes."

"My eyes are up here," said Deanna wryly.

"Those aren't what I was talking about," replied the nurse, as she continued sucking on the counselor's headlights.

"Shall I finish getting undressed?"

"Mm-hmm," answered Alyssa, sliding her hands down to help Deanna off with the rest of her clothes.

As Deanna stepped out of her garments, she slid her naked ass back up onto the exam bed and spread her legs into a hot beaver-pose. "I'm ready for you to examine my yum-yum cake," she said with incredible seriousness.

Ogawa sat on a short stool, bringing her to eye level with Deanna's red-snapper. "Have you been having any problems with your doodle-sack?"

"Actually," answered the counselor as she fingered her yeast-bag, "I've had a terrible case of beaver-fever. I've been so horny lately! I just keep coming on to people, no matter where we are."

Just then, they heard a giggle from the other side of the exam curtain. Turning, Ogawa caught sight of a young acting-ensign eaves-dropping on them. "Wesley Crusher!" At his name, Wesley turned and ran. "You dirty little peeping Tom! I'm telling your mother!"

"Relax," said Deanna as she continued to play with her fox-hole. "With a beaver this nice, I've had lots of beaver-shooters following me around. There are beaver-posses all over the ship."

*****

Around the corner from Sickbay, Wesley came to a stop, trying to catch his breath. "I did it!" he exclaimed to his friend, Jake Kurland. "I snuck in and got to see Counselor Troi's yeast-mill. She was completely naked, and I saw her bean-bags and her cheese-factory! Her fish-box had big ol' bacon-strips on either side, and a great big joy-buzzer on top!"

*****

Back inside the exam room, the nurse and her patient got back to business. "With a sugar-scoop as nice as yours," said Alyssa, "it's no wonder you're so horny."

"Is there anything you can do about it?" asked Deanna. Her fingers had not yet left the confines of her butter-boat.

"Let me see if I can help," said Ogawa. Standing, she undid her uniform and stripped it off. "I think you have a dietary deficiency. You need to eat more cherry-pie!" And with that, the nurse climbed up onto the exam table and pushed her jam-pot into the counselor's face. "And don't forget the cherry-pit at the top."

Deanna began tonguing the nurse's bottomless-pit, sliding as far inside her skin-chimney as she could. Meanwhile, Alyssa alternated between caressing her own milk-shakes and squeezing Deanna's cream-jugs. She enjoyed feeling the contrast between her own little titties and Troi's enormous teats.

"Well, well, well," said Doctor Crusher, announcing her presence as she slid the curtain aside. Doctor Selar was with her. "I bring a fellow doctor in for a professional consultation, and what do I find? Our ship's counselor with her face buried in my head nurse's fur-pie! So tell me, Deanna dear -- is her little yeast-biscuit tasty?"

"She has the sweetest little organ-grinder I've ever tasted," exclaimed Deanna, her face covered with twat juice.

"Ever?" asked Beverly in mock anger. "What about *my* coffee-grinder?"

"I don't remember," teased Deanna. "Better let me taste it again." As Crusher began to strip, Troi turned to Selar. "Well, don't think you're going to be the only one here with clothes on. Let me see that gristle-gripper of yours."

Moments later, a naked Selar sat up on the exam bed next to a naked Crusher and a naked Ogawa. A naked Troi then said, "I have an idea." Wrapping a length of gauze around her head as a blindfold, she said, "Let's do a taste test."

She knelt before one love-box and tasted. Then she moved on to the rosebud next to it, and the crab-cove next to that. The last one belonged to Selar, who had neglected to shave for a while. "My, but this one's a hairy-Mary," exclaimed Deanna playfully.

"Doesn't matter," said Selar. "It's a regular penis-fly-trap, the boys like it so much."

"Yeah," laughed Alyssa. "That thing is an old-hat, because it is frequently felt!"

"Well, I think it's a 'bel-chose'," said Beverly. "It's a 'beautiful thing'."

*****

The women were so intent on enjoying each other's love-nests that they did not hear the Sickbay doors open and close. Wesley and Kurt snuck back in to try to catch another surreptitious look. They peered into the exam room at the four naked women, who had slid down to the floor and were now in a daisy-chain of sorts.

While Troi continued to eat Selar's mons-veneris, Selar leaned over and sucked at Crusher's mother-of-all-saints. Beverly was licking Alyssa's hole-of-Venus, while the petite head nurse sucked eagerly at the Betazoid's badger.

"Look at them going down on each other's bayonet-wounds," joked Kurt.

"Their what?"

"Y'know. Their gash. Their everlasting-wound."

"Yeah, whatever," responded Wes.

"Hey, check out your mom's dick-muncher," teased Kurt. "She has an awesome looking fuck-hole."

"Cut it out," complained Wes. "And be quiet, or they'll hear you."

"They won't hear nothin'. They're too busy eatin' each other's snatches. Yes sir, that stink-hole of your mom's is hot. I'd love to slide inside that cock-alley of hers."

"I said shut up!" cried Wesley in a hoarse whisper. Nevertheless, he couldn't resist looking at his own mother's poozle, spread wide before him.

*****

With a heavy sigh, Deanna pulled her muffin away from Alyssa's lapping tongue. "I'm sorry to leave you all at this point, but I'm afraid I have an appointment elsewhere."

Ogawa had effortlessly closed the open link in their suck-circle and was now feasting ravenously on Selar's Holiday Inn. Troi stood for a moment, a hand between her legs, fingering her door-bell while she looked at the scene before her. Her other hand massaged her boom-booms. "It looks like you'll get along fine without me. Tah!" She waved as she exited the room.

Beverly looked up slightly, not even removing her tongue from Alyssa's jelly-roll. "Haf a nithe day, Deeahhnahh!" she called, her mouth full of fillet-o-fish.

*****

Stepping outside to dress, Troi bumped straight into the spying boys. Her beef-bags were mashed into Wesley's face. Kurt stumbled backward and fell on his ass. He sat there, staring straight up at Deanna's exposed slit.

"Well, aren't you a couple of horny little bastards," she said. "I see the pussy-patrol is out in full force."

The two teens just stood there -- too scared to run, too awed to speak.

Deanna stepped closer to Kurt, exposing her playpen even more "So tell me, have you ever tasted fresh tuna before?" Kurt shook his head. "Then it's high time you did. I have the freshest fish in the Fed." With that, she pushed her stink-well into Kurt's face.

She turned to Wesley. "Well, don't just stand there like a stupid little turd! These bazumbas aren't going to suck themselves." Grabbing Wes by the scruff of the neck, she pushed him between her heaving hooters, nearly smothering him.

Just then, the intercom beeped. "Yar to Troi."

"Dammit!" exclaimed Deanna, before groping for her comm-badge in the crumpled heap of her uniform. "Troi here."

"You're late for our appointment."

"Acknowledged. On my way." With that, she disengaged herself from her two youthful suitors and began dressing. The boys watched with distress as the on-going uniform covered up first her miraculous-pitcher, and then each of her beautiful flesh-bombs.

"Sorry to leave you fellas in a lurch, but I gotta go. Tell you what. You guys keep practicing, and maybe we can do this again sometime." With that, she disappeared out the door.

Each of the boys began rubbing their crotches uncontrollably. "Well," said Wesley. "I think I'll head back to my quarters to... uh... study! Yeah, that's it. I'm gonna go study now. Real hard."

"Yeah, me too," agreed Kurt. "I think I might study two or three times!"

*****

The door to Tasha Yar's quarters slid open in response to Troi's buzzing. Stepping inside, the counselor found the Enterprise's security officer standing in the middle of the room with a stern expression on her face. "You're late."

"I'm sorry." Deanna looked down, as if ashamed, but could not resist looking back up to gaze upon Tasha's sultry form.

The svelte blonde stood with hands on hips, most of her weight on one leg as she cocked her hips to one side. Black stiletto heels were strapped to her feet by long black bands which snaked their way up almost to her knees. A black leather fetish-bikini was about her waist, but with the central panels gone, they seductively framed her blond bush in front and toned ass in back. Likewise, her cup-less black leather bra framed her pert boobies without covering them.

"You're no doubt late because you've been letting others play with that muff of yours all over the ship. Well, now it's my turn, so strip!" Deanna quickly complied. Again, her bags-of-mystery came into view, followed quickly by her zone-of-wantonness.

It was suddenly apparent how busy Deanna had been. Her sweater-meat had bite marks all over them, and her source-of-sin was red and swollen.

"Step forward," ordered Tasha, and Deanna obeyed. Tasha thrust a finger inside her fig. "Yes, your quim is quite wet, you little slut." With her finger still inside Deanna's bunny, Tasha rubbed her thumb against Troi's spare-tongue. Deanna shuddered and groaned, prompting Yar to withdraw her digits.

"I don't appreciate you sharing yourself with everyone aboard but me." Tasha lay down on her nearby bed and spread her legs. "Service me!"

Deanna smiled, as she was only too happy to comply. She crawled between Yar's thighs. Tasha herself spread her vessel wide, and Deanna gazed lovingly into the hole-of-no-return before leaning forward with her tongue outstretched.

"Ohh," moaned Tasha as she felt Troi go to work on her mouse-trap. As she squirmed on the tip of Deanna's tongue, Tasha played with her two-fers. She squeezed one of her meat-balls while twisting the other, then reversed the process.

Meanwhile, down below, Deanna continued to play with Tasha's pink-bits. She stuck two fingers inside her vicious-circle while continuing to lap at it with her tongue.

"Ohh," moaned Tasha again, even louder, as she continued to tug roughly on her dumplings.

Deanna then turned herself around to assume a sixty-nine position. She lowered her own pencil-sharpener down onto Tasha's waiting mouth as she continued sucking wantonly on Yar's snapping-turtle. Her honkers bounced up and down against Tasha's stomach, while Yar's own erect num-nums tickled Deanna's belly.

Tearing herself away from the blonde's snack-bar, Deanna focused her attention on Tasha's firm howitzers. The warheads were quickly activated beneath Deanna's dancing tongue. In fact, the horny counselor didn't think there was a finer set of twins on the whole Enterprise. She sensuously sucked on one babaloo while squeezing the other ducky, then switched.

All the while, Tasha moaned and tossed about in ecstasy. She reached down to play with her own rat-hole, her fingers sliding in and out of her slot. With the fingers of one hand still inside her gig, she reached out with the other to fondle Deanna's punching bags. If Tasha's tits were scuds, then Deanna's were canons at least.

The soft flesh of Troi's bon-bons sliding between Yar's fingers while she frigged her own black-hole sent Tasha over the edge in her first orgasm of the evening. But Deanna was many orgasms ahead of her, and Yar was determined to catch up.

Tasha rolled over onto her hands and knees. "I want you inside me again! I want you in my warmest-place. Finger my Venus-fly-trap. Suck my Pandora's-box."

Deanna quickly complied, eating out the blonde's dark-hole from behind. She reached forward to fondle Yar's sweet-rolls at the same time, working hard to get her lover off again. Tasha put her own hands on top of Deanna's, on top of her flip-flaps. Together, they squeezed and rubbed her meat-loaves while Deanna ate out her kitty until she came a second time.

Exhausted, they collapsed beside each other on the bed. Tasha rested her head on Deanna's soft kettle-drums, while Troi gently played with the nips of Yar's sweater-treats. "You have such nice buzwams," commented Deanna, still toying with her matched-set.

Tasha reached up and fondled the bumpers she was resting her head on. "And you have wonderful air-bags, my darling."

They both giggled as they snuggled against each other.

*****

A couple hours later, Deanna walked slowly into Ten Forward. Although she had washed up and rested a bit, her flesh-bags and man-trap were still very sore, and she walked carefully to minimize her discomfort.

She saw Data sitting by himself and wandered over to him. "Hello, Data. May I join you?"

"Of course, Counselor." As Deanna took a seat, a waitress stepped up to the table to take her order. In an effort to be helpful, a still slightly confused Data said, "May I suggest the fur-burger?"

(End)